Now I know that this seems super exciting, but I have to tell you that it really has impacted my life in such a way that I had to blog about it. So without further ado...
PSA: If any of you have ever seen these and wondered "Wow, that actually might be a more pleasant way to take my medicine" - just a heads up, DON'T even try it.
I had a nasty upper respiratory something a while ago and it hit me something fierce. When I get sick like this I usually take Nyquil and some extra benadryl before going to bed so I can sleep better.
However, much to my dismay I noticed we were out of Nyquil as I was getting ready for bed one night. Because I wasn't feeling too hot I definitely was not going to go to the store to get some more, so I dug around the medicine cabinet a little bit to try and see if maybe by chance I had missed some Nyquil capsules floating around somewhere.
Then I found these lovely little tea packets! I now love drinking hot lemon water with honey when I'm sick (thanks Zeph!) and thought this couldn't be too bad. Nyquil in hot liquid tea form!
Well, it was exactly just that. The only thing worse than drinking 2 tablespoons of Nyquil is drinking a whole 8 fl oz. It was NASTY. I don't know what I was expecting, but it definitely wasn't anything remotely resembling honey, lemon, or chamomile. It was straight up Nyquil in all its deceptive glory.
So word to the wise, if you ever run across this stuff just do yourself a favor and buy the Nyquil intsead, because you can get the 2 tbs down in 1 gulp instead of 10. Ugh. I still can't even hardly stand thinking of it.
Hello, hello! Welcome! Sorry it has taken me so long to get this blog back up and running! I have been waiting for the perfect post to open this back up, but alas - I have struggled. Changes will continue to be made. Even though I'm busy I can't indefinitely put this off, so here goes nothing...
I discovered this song by Joy Williams a few weeks ago and I probably listened to it about 20 times that first day. I love the message.
I needed this. Over the past few weeks, I have felt for the first time in a long time that there is a plan for me. And this song really resonated deep in my heart. A message of embracing anything that may come my way in the future. Even love.
Wanna try that again?
Sometimes I am afraid of moving forward, but I also realize I can't go back. I have some really sweet memories from growing up, from college, from starting my career, from living on my own. I miss my dear girlfriends from high school. I miss my college friends. I miss working with my babies in the NICU.
But that is not my life right now. As my path has been unfolded there have been many changes. Some forks in the road have been closed off to me at this point, and others I had never even thought of swung their gates wide open.
You can only go on.
This song helped me remember that there is so much to look forward to. I have had some big dreams and for a while I worried that I was only pursuing them to fill a void I felt in my life - aka being single. People always told me to pursue my dreams and do everything I wanted to while I still had time because "you're single." And for a while, I lost sight of the bigger picture and agreed with them. I thought "yeah!" I was going to create this amazing life and show people that being single still had value and was not to be pitied. The fact that I felt pressured - and still do sometimes - to show people I still was worth something without being married is crazy.
But - I have come to realize a lot about myself in the last year. I learned that it doesn't matter if I do a single dang thing that I had planned to do to make my life "fulfilling." It doesn't matter whether or not I go to grad school, it doesn't matter whether or not I travel the world, it doesn't matter if I'm not 100% sure what I want to do with my life yet.
What really matters is that I'm moving forward, improving myself, and learning to love myself for who I am, by whatever method I see best. What really matters is that I'm doing my best to be a disciple of Jesus Christ. What really matters is that I make the best I can of this life, to be of use to the people around me.
I'm trying to be better about standing up during the hard times and being willing give things a shot again. I'm slow to hop on the self-discovery train, but I can truly say that at this point in my life I don't really care about what others think about me and the progress I've made with my life. It's been a long, long time since I've felt that way and it's taken me a lot of work to get here. I understand that I probably won't always feel this way, but I'm learning to be gentle with myself and be who I want to be no matter the deck of cards life hands to me. I'm not going to downgrade my life to the expectation others might have of my reality. There is no holding back of true dreams here. The path to these dreams is filled with wonder and discovery and hard work, and I can't think of anything else I'd rather be doing.
My mom always told me that no one wants to read a book with characters who live the perfect life - there's nothing motivational or inspiring in that, so why wish that for your own life?
This post may be a little cliche, but that's okay. I am constantly headed in directions that I never thought I would take, and I know that God is guiding that path. I don't always understand, but I have to go on. I have to be willing to try again, and I am trying to be in the business of taking good chances. After all, we can never go back.
Thanks for reading, hope you are having a wonderful day wherever you are!
